Learn to say no without explaining yourself

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Hello,

How are you?

– I’m fine, what about you?

What can I say?

– Why, what happened?

Nothing, nothing. I have a favour to ask?

-What is it?

Nothing much ,I just want you to help me with my college project. You know I am no good at coming but you are a genius. Please help.

-Thanks, but I am busy these days.

You will need only some hours for this. Please do it brother.

-I said, I am busy.

What are you doing, that you are so busy?

-Nothing much just working on some ideas.

Well, that doesn’t mean you can’t give me only 2 hours. I know, I know, you don’t what to help.

- it’s not like that, but I am really busy.

Please, please help me, aren’t you my best friend?

-Ok ok I’ll try. I’ll ju….

Thank you, thank you very much.

-Hey, listen I said I’ll try? Hello?

Call ended.

Isn’t it what happens with most of us?

Don’t know about you but personally it used to happen with me alot.

I always tried to help everyone before and felt it very difficult to say NO. But with the time and a deep research i have learnt many things, which we are going to discuss today.

So we’ll be discussing the following points in this article:

  • What it really means to say no?
  • Why you should start saying no?
  • What are the benefits of saying No?
  • What are the disadvantages of saying too much YES?
  • Learn to say no without explaining yourself
  • How can you say NO to your boss?

Open the parachute of your mind and get ready for NO diving.

To Say No Without Explaining Yourself

What it really means to say No?

Saying no isn’t about rejecting every request, but it’s simply setting up your boundaries (remember boundaries, not walls). Saying no is about knowing your boundaries.

Here i used the term ‘boundaries’, not ‘walls’ or anything else meaning that you can change your boundary limits, because you are the master of your fate.

You must understand the priorities of yours and those who are dependent on you.

Out of that if anyone asks for help than you have to think and act keeping in mind your priorities.

Why you should start saying NO?

Many of us, suffer due to the fact that we waste most of our time helping those who don’t even care about us, and simply for what?

For people pleasing. Don’t mind it’s not your fault, it’s inherited from generations.

We always run out of time because we don’t priorities our own tasks and are always willing to say YES to unimportant tasks.

Ok, why you should start saying no?

The answer is very simple yet very important, as follows:

Whenever you say YES to any unimportant task keep in mind that you are also saying NO to an important task.

So, if you want to build your focus on important tasks than you have to say NO to unimportant tasks.

Some of the other reasons why you should start saying no are as follows:

1. The Human feelings

First we will understand, why we say too much yes and than after identifying them you can work on minimizing them.

  • Because we don’t want, that our image in any other person goes down.
  • We want to be acknowledged as good, caring and helpful.
  • For pleasing others.

2.The real World

Most of the time, what we hear is this whole world is a big family and we have to help each other, but first help yourself and if time remains than help others.

Most of the time people uses all the goodies (the yes man) .

so, don’t get used, instead help Only as much as you can.

3. You are also important to yourself.

Most of the people are ready to give their lives for their families,but are they ready for themselves?

No.

i personally know many people who work damn hard but don’t take care of themselves.

That’s not good.

Include yourself in the circle whom you want to protect and take care of.

4. You missed the opportunity

Many times, I see people who are really good.

These people are too busy to help others that their own opportunities get missed.

So, it’s important that you focus in what is important and try to say no to Unimportant ones.

5. Saying YES mean saying NO

Confused?

We have discussed it already.

Whenever you say YES to any unimportant task keep in mind that you are also saying NO to an important task.

Keep this in mind and don’t forget again.

There are many many many benefits of saying NO, which we are going to discuss in the next section.

What are the Benefits of saying NO?

There are many benefits of saying no to unimportant tasks, we’ll discuss some of them here:

1. Give you free Time

We all know that Time is Money. And we all suffer for its shortage.

With every second gone waste, we pay the price in future.

When you say yes to everyone, than you work beyond your limits due to which you don’t have enough time for yourself.

That’s why I mentioned earlier stop saying YES to everyone.

2. Meet the deadlines

When you start to say no, it’ll provide you with more than enough time.

Almost 80 percent of people waste their time due to their habit of saying yes for inappropriate and unimportant tasks.

But when you stop doing this, you’ll meet the deadlines regularly and hence it will result in both increment in your career opportunities and reputation.

3. Reduces Stress

As you have plenty of time and meet your deadlines regularly, I don’t think there will be any stress.

Having stress can also cause several negative health affects, so being stress free is important.

Having plenty of free time for spending with friends and family can cancel out any kind of stress.

4. Improves your productivity

Do less but be productive.

When you learn to avoid any kind of distractions and can focus completely on the important tasks, then it will intensely amplify your productivity.

5. Improves your time management skills

When you say yes to everyone, than you don’t have any control of yours on your time.

But when you start saying no you have that control on your time. And this can help you with improving your time management skills.

Managing your time is very important, but first you need to have control on your time.

Want to read more about Importance of time management.?

6. Improves your physical and mental health

As soon as you start rejecting the unimportant tasks and start living a healthy life, your overall health will be at a next level.

Also it will increase concentration and happiness in your life.

There are many more benifits but I don’t want the article to be a book.

What are the disadvantages if you say yes to everyone?

This section is totally opposite of the last section, all the benifits will be turned into disadvantages such as:

  • You will have no free time for yourself.
  • There will be high chances that you will miss your deadlines.
  • It will increase the stress level and decreasing the immunity.
  • It will also decrease your productivity because you will be focusing on too many things.
  • It will affect your time management schedule as you have to change the tune for your tasks again and again as you will be doing others task in that time.
  • It will negatively affect both of your physical and mental health.

And many more, so it’s advisory that you start saying no otherwise you will regret in the future.

Saying No doesn’t makes you a bad person.

Learn to say no without explaining yourself

If you don’t prioritize your life, somebody else will.

So, without wasting any further we will discuss the points by following which you will be able to say no without any explanations.

1. Be assertive

Most of the people don’t ask for help directly, they ask only if they need.

So be patient and listen to them, although you have decided to say no. Be patient and listen.

Although it may be crazy why you should listen, when you are not going to help. Have this question in mind?

I’ll answer it later.

2. Be direct and straight forward

Keeping in mind, the first point you can simply say: Sorry but I can’t help you with it., or anything.

Just tell your priorities or tasks, need not to explain.

then simply say No.

3. Don’t stall time.

This is very important.

You should not ask them for some time or promise them that you will do it later, if you are genuinely not interested.

As mentioned in the second point be straight forward and say No with respect.

4. Substitute No

It’s not mandatory to say no, you can use other words because people think No as a negative word and take it as self rejections.

I personally don't agree with this. No is a positive word, you can consider this sentence: I'm not going to drink again. Or any other. 

You can say something like, I would like to help you out with this but I’m sorry, I have an important task to do.

5. Offer Alternative

Do you have that question still in your mind?

I asked you to listen patiently, now I think you got the answer.

If you have somebody in your mind who can help with that task, and is genuinely interested, than you can refer to that person.

6. Identifying When to say YES!

Are you crazy?

Now you are asking us to say Yes? Are you mad?

Hey hey, I’m not.

I mean you just identify the most important task which you need to complete. Now stick with it.

As I said earlier, when you say yes to any task you mean no to another task.

7. Good Vibes

Always say no respectfully and convincingly.

But why bothering about that?

Because if say no in anger or anything else, then you will feel guilty.

So, to avoid that situation, it’s recommended that you follow this step.

8. Be a little selfish

The best way you can be selfish is by taking care of yourself.

so just prioritize your tasks, focus on what you need to do, and take care of yourself so that you can keep those happy whom you want to protect.

How can you say NO to your boss?

You can say no to your boss by following the following steps:

1. First say YES!

What, I understood why I have to say last time but now? Again?

Hmm.

This time you really have to say yes for whatever project he/she is assigning.

2. Ask for details

Yup, now as I asked above to listen first, similar here.

Ask your boss for the details.

Ask politely, don’t be like Hey, give me the details!

It helps you understand whether the project is really big or you can finish it up within 30 minutes.

3. Ask for prioritizing

Now, give your boss, your progress report:

Sir, I’m doing task A, followed by task B and task C. Please can you reprioritize the tasks for me.

As a boss, they have the right to set priorities of the tasks, so give them the job.

then ask him for any extension which he or she could provide.

4. Postpone

Now he doesn’t gave any extension, then you can ask him for postponing any task which he could.

If he does then it will be fine otherwise proceed to next step.

5. How to do?

Now tell him straight forward, with respect how am I supposed to do it?

Ask him/her can you please tell me how am I supposed to do all these tasks in so less time?

If, he says you have to do it, do overtime or whatever!

then ask for the overtime, or just say him it’s out of my capabilities if you force me to do this any way then please spare me for quality work.

If agrees, then you can go with your fastest speed.

But if he doesn’t agree with it and denying to pay you overtime then best of luck with your job.

Conclusion

Saying no is more important than saying Yes!

Learn to say no and it will improve your life quality, a thousand times.

Follow these steps and if you have any query than comment or contact us.

General Questions

What it really means to say No?

Saying no isn’t about rejecting every request, but it’s simply setting up your boundaries (remember boundaries, not walls). Saying no is about knowing your boundaries.

Why you should start saying NO?

Whenever you say YES to any unimportant task keep in mind that you are also saying NO to an important task.

So, if you want to build your focus on important tasks than you have to say NO to unimportant tasks.

Some of the other reasons why you should start saying no are as follows:

  • The Human feelings
  • The real World
  • You are also important to yourself.
  • You missed the opportunity
  • Saying YES mean saying NO.

If you have any queries, I have explained all these points above in detail.

What are the Benefits of saying NO?

There are many benefits of saying no:

  • Give you free Time
  • Meet the deadlines
  • Reduces Stress
  • Improves your productivity
  • Improves your time management skills
  • Improves your physical and mental health

There are infinite benifits of saying NO.

What are the disadvantages if you say yes to everyone?

Some of the disadvantages are:

  • You will have no free time for yourself.
  • There will be high chances that you will miss your deadlines.
  • It will increase the stress level and decreasing the immunity.
  • It will also decrease your productivity because you will be focusing on too many things.
  • It will affect your time management schedule as you have to change the tune for your tasks again and again as you will be doing others task in that time.
  • It will negatively affect both of your physical and mental health.

Learn to say no without explaining yourself-How?

The points by following which you will be able to say no without any explanations:

  • Be assertive
  • Be direct and straight forward
  • Don’t stall time
  • Substitute No
  • Offer Alternatives
  • Identifying When to say YES!
  • Good Vibes
  • Be a little selfish

How can you say NO to your boss?

You can even say no to your boss, how? Let’s see:

  • First say YES!
  • Ask for details
  • Ask for prioritizing
  • Postpone
  • How to do?

Remember: All the steps should be followed in order.

Have any suggestions or want any topic to be covered than you are most welcome.

Hope, you will be fine.

Thanks!

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Dharmendra Mayla
Dharmendra, is a self help writer and content creator. He have a graduation degree f rom University of JV, Rajasthan, India. He have written many articles and published many e-books, and have a very diligent habit of research before writing anything. Want to know more? Read Here

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